All new: All the single ladies

Part 1: Dear friend,

I have the urge to write you, you that are known and unknown to me. You’re all known and created by God, the God who created heaven and earth. Earlier this week I wrote two notes to myself; I like to share those with you, but first I need to inform you about the state that I’m in. I’m a young Christian woman, educated and single. Earlier this year, I was close to a breakdown, because I’ve been focusing on what I don’t have (yet).  Everybody has a need or a longing; maybe you’re already married but childless. Maybe you’re already married with children, but you don’t have the house, the vehicle or the favourite dog you’ve been praying for. The need or longing could be everything, but this personal letter is especially for the single women who are continuously waiting on God to send them ‘the one’.


I believe I could be the one God calls. That doesn’t mean I’m perfect. I love God. That doesn’t mean I always trust Him completely. In my frustration I was wondering how God can the find ‘the one’ who is meant for me. – I don’t believe in just one person that is made for you or me. I believe that you have to make a daily choice to be ‘the one’ for each other in a relationship. You daily say: “Yes I do”. It’s so similar to being the one God chooses and calls. Everyday you have to say: “YES”! Two men can be competent for me, but I just need one man! That’s the reason I prefer writing about ‘the one’ for me. – Anyway, I’ll continue to write about trusting God. The darkness wants me to question the greatness of God’s work and most essentially the existence of God. I wrote this small note to encourage myself, note one:

Sometimes it feels like there is no God. But then my mind says: “There must be One, the God of heaven and earth”. Sometimes my mind is troubled and doubt wants to get in. But then my heart knows there is One lover of my soul: God.

Part 2: Body, soul and spirit

I love to analyse, mostly myself, reflecting on what I did, meant or wrote. I think that in this concept (referring to my first note) my mind resembles my body, for my eyes see the wonders of God: His creation. My heart is my soul. It’s the centre of my emotions, the way I feel: angry, sad or happy.  I don’t know if you´ve noticed, but in my first note I didn’t write about my spirit. We humans, yes even men, have three dimensions namely the body, the soul and the spirit. I think nowadays we´re afraid to talk about our spirit. Why is that? Non-believers, people who do not believe in God, call themselves spiritual. Outside the churches people are more spiritual than in the church. What’s up with that? The following note is written to me, so don´t in any way feel judged by it. Note two:

There’s a constant battle going on. Paul [the apostle] warned me about this [through the Bible], but this is the moment that I really grab it. This is the moment that I really understand. Life is an on-going process of trial, tribulations and tests to prove a point. To whom? To prove what actually? Some people see a spirit and a soul as synonyms. I just can’t, because I know what is right. My spirit is called and my soul and my body should submit to my spirit. The Holy Spirit [which is closer to us than God the Father and Jesus Christ the Son] speaks to your spirit, but how many times do we answer? Who is your comforter on earth? It’s the Spirit. If we live a spiritual life, we know that all the other things do not matter (…). I want a husband. My body says so, my souls says so. I need a husband. But in fact I know that there are higher things I need to hold on to, I need to step into. We’re liars to ourselves: You don’t want to be lonely; everybody [around] you is married now. What does your spirit need now? [I should be] living with a true call. That doesn’t mean I don’t want a husband, because I really do want one.

needed this note because I had an internal battle going on (the body and the soul against the spirit). Internal but not eternal. I want to add to my last note that we have to trust that time is in God’s hands. My goal is to encourage the women who are waiting for that special one. I truly know what you´re going through. Although you might feel alone, you’re not alone. Although you might think that being with a non-believer is easier than coping with feelings of loneliness, you might be wrong. All I know is that we have to wait. Wait for the one who can be a true help and blessing in your life. When you´re down -and yes, we real women have those moments- he can pray for and with you. Do not allow yourself to have a pity party. I believe that my future husband and I are going to be ‘one’. That means that I have to be ‘one’ with myself: I have to be in balance. P.S. My personal advice is to wait for that someone who’s also ‘one’ with himself. Do you want to settle for less? But even more important: Focus on what the Holy Spirit wants you to do. Have a spiritual encounter with your Comforter. Be one. Let’s remind each other this. (2010) Naomi is the founder of NEWSOFPEACE.COM and her aim is to start a movement in her own environment: a movement that is based on the Good News, the Word of God. She recently got married (2011).

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